I just couldn't do it.
The idea of buying the scary underpants is a mental barrier I've been unable to conquer. I've heard raving reviews about Spanx, but in the end, I couldn't get past the idea of shoving myself into scary underpants for an entire day. I'll be honest, I had visions of the consternation that would accompany my first trip to the ladies' room, and of the affect the scary underpants would have on potential amorous adventures.
By way of punishment, I ended up buying a new dress. I won't lie, the dress, a Diana Von Furstenberg, is really nice, and it looked good on, but if you are thinking, "A designer dress...exactly how is that a punishment?" let me enlighten you. The dress, a Diane Von Furstenberg, comes with a noticable price tag. As in, 'I've only ever owned one item of clothing that was more expensive, and that was my wedding dress.' My bank account, I assure you, is feeling the punishment, which in turn is making me feel the punishment (now, and for weeks to come, I'm sure).
I really tried to find an alternative that worked. I searched all kinds of stores for days, and tried on probably a dozen dresses, but nothing was working. Poor selection, poor cuts and designs, not matching shoes bought specifically for this occasion, or only fair reactions at best from Etienne was making this a woeful experience.
If you want a sneak peak, here you go.
My body from 3 years ago...
...Wish you were here.
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