February 7/14

I know you are just dying for an update on the interviews today, but you'll have to wait a couple of weeks, for two reasons: one, the competition is still on-going and several of our friends and colleagues have yet to have their interviews, and two, oh.  my.  gawd.  I had an experience that just defies common sense, and I need time to get over the nerves about it and move on to the 'look back and laugh' stage.

Instead, you will be treated to my thoughts on the Olympics opening ceremony!

The Fashion Parade:

The big flops were Argentina, France, the US, Italy, Israel and Canada.  Argentina underwhelmed with boring, dark, straightforward colours.  France...I don't know what to say to you, Lacoste.  Fail.  The French as supposed to be known for their fashion instincts, and instead, they kitted out their team in mismatched comfortable tan dungarees and depressing medium grey coats.  Oy.  The US...I believe I heard it somewhere on The Colbert Report or some comedy show, but honestly those jackets look like a cardigan fucked a quilt and the result was that coat design.  Italy, I mean, come on, Giorgio Armani, are you just phoning this in?  Bo-ring!  Israel...your team genuinely looked like you raided your grandfather's closet and stole his leisure suits (multiple, because he finds them so comfortable, he bought a dozen so he'd always have them around).  And Canada, it wasn't awful, but we've done so much better in the past, this was just not up to those standards.  Honourable mention to Georgia, which had way too many flags and their country name covering every surface.

The big winners were the Austrian and Slovenian toques, the Norwegian 60s hipster-fabulous hats, the Danes boots and laces, the Czech hats (YES!  FTW!), and the Russian teams coordinated pants and jackets look.  Honourable mention goes to the Slovaks for putting their enormous flagbearer, Boston Bruins defenseman Zdeno Chara in a uniform covered in hearts.  It was an AWWW moment.

The Show:

I liked the tributes to the arts and literature of Russia, but they totally lost me once the goofy whale made of dancers and dancing buildings came on the scene.  My attention was completely gone by the time the 1917 Revolution dragged its way across the arena.  After that there was a floating hammer and sickel, a brilliant Soprano singing the Olympic Anthem, and, oh hey, a Chinese Baby tricking out of a skateboard, that's adorable!

Oh, right, the show.  Yeah, it ended with a racist lighting the olympic torch.  Good job, Russian Federation.  Because nothing reflects the Olympic spirit of human achievement better than the offcial torch being lit by someone who compares Black people to monkeys.  So enlightened.

And with that, I will finish my wine and go to bed.

Happy Olympicing!

...Wish you were here.